At dinner, there used to be magicians operating the tables. Photo: Graham Turner for the Guide for the Guardian
In 2010 I went to the wedding of my ex-husbands boss. The ceremony took place in a very fancy Footballers Wives-type inn in Surrey. Wed booked an ordinary room but the groom had paid for everyone to be upgraded to suites with their own garden. He too receded 10,000 in money the day before merely is payable for all the different entertainers not including the cost of the inn, nutrient and beverages of course.
We arrived to a cord quartet, and the acrobats emerged shortly after that and did a number while we booze champagne before the meal.The starter was asparagus floozy, and as there had been so much champagne before the snack, there was a rush for the loo before the main course. The smell of asparagus wee-wee when you opened the door to the girls was extraordinary.
We then went into dinner “where theres” magicians labor the tables. Just before pudding, the attendants burst into song they were good and it was actually quite funny. The whole circumstance was absolutely ridiculous and had nothing at all to do with two people pledging their “ve been wanting to” each other. And by 4am the hotel had solely run out of champagne, apparently. Quite the most horrible and yet stupefying wedding Ive ever been to.