Its the first state call of Donald Trumps presidency, and the superpower foursome are certainly delivered the goods

Never will we be endowed such a dream give of press photos as the three period Macron-Trump tete-a-tete, the first day of which has pictured the foursome inspect the former residence of George Washington and awkwardly plant a tree. As presents from France to the US lead, some have pointed out that this tree is not exactly up there with the Statue of Liberty. The tree is more of a flowers-from-the-petrol station sort of effort.( It is, though, apparently substantial foliage, in that the oak grew on one of France’s former first world war battlefields ).

The Macrons’ expedition is the firstly territory trip from foreign chairmen to Trump, who is the firstly president in 100 years not to have viewed a government visit in his first time of office. It’s difficult to be a good host, between watching Fox& Friends, tweeting relentlessly and egregiously piquing most groups in society at a caprice. But Trump opted the Macrons as a return invitation after he and Melania wasted Bastille Day with the Macrons in Paris . Let us take a closer look at the latest couples’ minibreak.

Rolling the red carpet out, for, something … Photograph: Jacquelyn Martin/ AP

We begin with the above image, which I have titled, in homage to Magritte, Ceci n’est pas un avion . Because frankly, there is a glaring omission here.

French President Macron and his wife, Brigitte, exiting their plane. Photograph: Jim Lo Scalzo/ EPA

I care about this image because Brigitte’s coat is amazing. There’s a Jackie Onassis colour-match here( albeit specific the getup Onassis wore on the day of JFK’s assassination ). The hair is Louis Vuitton, one of Brigitte’s favourite labels. The cigarette pants are tres French. Her husband is simply garmented as a standard Amis, ie. A Man in a Clothing. But I note that Melania likewise elected a French designer to wear( Givenchy, with Louboutin shoes ); more on this outfit anon.

Jackie O wearing one of her logo daring emblazon coats. Photograph: Vin Cataani/ EPA

‘ So, you view …’ Photograph: Jim Lo Scalzo/ EPA

Here’s Macron doing” the Blair” mitt gesture, since developed as the centrist premiere hand-move du jour . We’ve seen Barack Obama and Justin Trudeau utilise it, and even Angela Merkel. I have never seen anybody other than a politician do this with handwritings when they speak.

Digging their own graves? Photograph: Jim Watson/ AFP/ Getty Images

The main event, the tree-planting. What I enjoy about this photograph is that neither Melania nor Brigitte has any remote intention of helping, while Trump and Macron bury their dying approval ratings and, perhaps in Trump’s occasion, Michael Cohen’s paper trail from the Stormy Daniels case. And the Steele dossier. And all other intel on Russia. He’ll probably be finished by nightfall. Meanwhile, Brigitte has the constitute of persons who merely landed a cherry-red and a green on her first two moves in a game of Twister.

Work it, Melania Photograph: Jonathan Ernst/ Reuters

Perhaps the best shot of the knot, because: Melania. As well as expressing the kind of epic whisker movie that belongs on catwalks or in shampoo adverts( which would make sense, granted Melania’s former modelling busines) it’s interesting to speculate what she might be secreting under the cape. Perhaps a carry-on, containing all the stuff one needs when one is planning to run away from one’s awful spouse? Or perhaps this is why the Macrons apparently didn’t need an aeroplane, because Melania flew them over. We only don’t know.

Harp at that! Photograph: Ludovic Marin/ AFP/ Getty Images

Please, give it up for random harmonica madam. Your typical woodland theatre headliner at Latitude Festival. Note Trump’s tepid motion- which, I’ll be honest, is probably the rectify response. The others are ignoring the harp female, in the manner of one invigorating one’s pace, leader down, past a tubing terminal busker with an eccentric instrument. I respect your decision to play the oboe sir, but is it actually working at the bottom of an escalator in King’s Cross?

She’s out Photograph: Saul Loeb/ AFP/ Getty Images

I’m gonna make the body-language is talking about itself here- because Melania, straight up, craves no part of this life any longer.


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